What a weird day to start a new blog. Well, plenty of emotions ran through my head today and i'm glad the day is almost over. So, I finally figured that loveheart doodles is not really a place where all emotions can be expressed clearly... as family read and various ages read. So welcome to my new secret-ish blog.
I'm going to be talking about my Valentines experience. I'm 16, so I wasn't expecting much or anything to happen today. Up until yesterday I had a boyfriend, we were totally fine.
In November we started talking, and we discovered we lived near, his college was literally a stone throw from my house. He was the most interesting thing on my mind, I couldn't wait to get his message everyday and I couldn't help sending one if he didn't.
One day we were talking, and somehow the subject "confession" came up. Through guilt he confesses that had done things with another girl, whilst dating me. As angry as I was I began to rant and rave and tears came to my eyes as he apologised. Stupidly, I told him I'd forget about it and we could move on.
From then he came round often and we had good times.
12TH FEBRUARY CONVO SWATCH
Lauren: I miss you
Brian: Me too man
Lauren: Do you wanna go to the funfair next week bae?
Brian: When?
Lauren: Well you get it cheap on Thursday?
Brian: Mans not balling and that but i'll see
Translation: I don't have money at the moment but I'll see.
Interpretation: I could see that Valentines wasn't going to be the Ritz and a romantic ride on the thames therefore I started coming up with everything we could do to have a great day free of charge.
13TH FEBRUARY CONVO SWATCH
Brian: I love you but I just can't do this anymore
Lauren: Oh, so you want to break up... Do what anymore? I take like 5 mins of your day to speak to you and see you once a week and that's too much?
Brian: yeah, too much is happening around me lately and I don't want to drag you in it.
Lauren: Say nothing, I was meant to be there during good and bad times
Brian: But you could get hurt
Lauren: Oh and this doesn't hurt? Whatever, fine.
Brian: Are you okay with it?
Lauren: No, but I don't have a choice and I can't force you
Brian: So what you're angry then?
Lauren: and upset
Brian: Yeah but the thing is I'm not that guy that leaves you hanging, I'll still talk to you and when anything is wrong tell me. I'll still see you if you want me to yeah?
Lauren: Okay.
Brian: :/
Lauren: Well what do you want me to say
Brian: Doesn't seem like we'll be talking then
Lauren: I don't mind
Brian: Obv you won't
Lauren: Whatever you want.
Brian: Not really, we can still be close
Lauren: I can't watch you fall in love with someone else, it's gonna hurt. From now to my exams I really don't need to be depressed.
Brian: Who said I'm moving to anyone? Why would I?
Translation: Who said I will go for anyone else?
Lauren: Well if we're breaking up that gives you the chance to
Brian: Not really because I still like you, why would I break up with you and move (go) for someone else? That's like trading a diamond for stones.
Lauren: Bye Brian.
So, on the 14th of Feb I barricaded myself in my room and had a good old cry, watched movies alone and distanced myself from all social media. Lauren being Lauren couldn't resist watching his snapchat which made me burst into tears... the guy that didn't have any money managed to take a girl shopping and they got a taxi around instead of public transport. Putting money aside, you were always too busy to see me and always rushing somewhere next. Brian, please treat her well - you WOULD NOT want to see another girl in my angry suicidal ready to kill heartbroken mood.
Back to my blog. So guys, I've now shared this with you and the reason behind it was to ask for help? What exactly do you think was wrong with Brian? Why the sudden break up a day before Valentines? Comments please! Lets have a disscusion, Thanks for reading.
